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Donna Day Ten
I’m learning lessons each day I’m here. I never thought of myself as an inherently vain person, but it would appear that I am. I never realised how much I fuss about my hair and my clothes when I’m back home but I do. I always wear a full face of make up, straighten my hair and spend ages wearing a coordinated outfit (coordinated in my head anyway!) Imagine my distress when I entered a country which instantly frizzed my hair, sweated the makeup off my face and was too hot for the matching khaki, black and white outfits that I’ve bought. It’s a hard thing for an insecure person…
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Where are we now? As long as there’s sun …
I’m not really one for planned excursions where the guides make you stop off at certain points and do as you’re told for a set amount of time, usually dotted with photo opportunities that you’re expected to grab and share and tag and show off with on social media. Some sightseeing is a must, though, and visiting the Mangroves is one of those. We’d chosen a half-day visit that involved a leisurely kayak ride and a stop to watch some cheeky monkeys from the boat. We were collected exactly on time and stopped off at a couple more hotels for other sightseers. They were all dressed for hiking in sturdy…
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Donna Day Nine
Whenever I imagined what going to Thailand would be like, I had two versions: one version would be a rustic , rainy place with blistering air, unnameable insects, dodgy water, strange meat dishes and a distinct lack of toilets. In short, in my most panicky moments, this was the image of Thailand that frightened me and made me want to back out of our holiday before it had even begun. And guess what? Thailand is hot! And rainy, and I’ve been bitten by various creepy crawlies, but there are toilets in every cafe, you just drink bottled water and there’s a plethora of delicious non-meaty food. I needn’t have worried.…
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Get me off the streets (get some protection) …
One of the marvellous things about Thailand is that most things are relatively straightforward and hassle free. I’ll use the example of logistics and compare with the UK: In preparation for our journey to Thailand, we had booked in advance and paid for train tickets to Manchester Airport. Then the rail workers announced a strike on the Thursday and Saturday flanking our flight day, so we had to find alternative transport as we were warned our train might be cancelled. I currently live in Rossendale in the UK and Donna lives in Clitheroe so other means of public transport were impossible without one of us catching four buses and the…
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Joe the Lion went to the bar. A couple of drinks on the house …
Literally drinking a bar dry of wine is great fun at the time, but not the next morning. And what’s really not fun is waking up the next morning realising that you booked a Muay Thai session for 10am and there’s no coffee in your holiday bungalow. I didn’t bother trying to waken Donna, as she’d stayed up having a bit of a party the night before; plenty of loud shouty swearing and the stamping of feet that I initially thought was caused by an intruder. When I ran round to check, I found that she was exterminating creatures with Avon Skin So Soft, which is an oily body moisturiser…
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Donna Day Seven and Eight
Joanne has been telling me how much I will love Koh Lanta – a little island just off the west of Thailand – but I have to admit, when we arrived here I was a little disappointed. It’s low season, many of the shops and restaurants are closed; the streets are dusty and basic, there are derelict, wind—torn buildings everywhere. And there are creatures here: lizards, geckos, ants, spiders, monkeys and chickens. But as soon as I’d unpacked my stuff in a lovely bungalow, all to myself, and settled into the laid-back vibe of Rasta Baby beach bar, I understood the magic of Koh Lanta. The people here are kind…
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Here we are, one magical moment, such is the stuff from where dreams are woven … tall in this room overlooking the ocean.
“This is going to be horrible. It’s horrendous. You’ll hate it.” “Oh god, I’m not looking forward to this. It’s gonna be shit.” “Fuck fuck FUUUUCCKKK! I DON’T WANT TO DO THIS!” Poor Donna was so stunned by my increasing sense of doom and despair that she felt the need to hide in the toilet trying to squeeze out any surplus fluids in case my fear of being caught short manifested itself in a long traffic jam in a jam-packed minibus with no air conditioning. The stuff of middle- aged lady nightmares. Yes, we were going on the road, and the sea, to Koh Lanta. I kept saying, “I’m hoping…
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Muay Thai training
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Donna Day 6
I told Joanne that today has been my favourite day so far, but that’s not true, because every single day has had its joys and there’s always been something to love. Today I had a foot massage and a facial on the beach. Joanne insisted we took a glass of wine with us because she’s done that before and felt like a lady of leisure drinking her wine and having her eyelashes done. However, what neither of us expected was to be told to lie down on our tummies while we has our feet softened and scraped. Quite an interesting, occasionally painful, experience. Our yelps and gurning faces made the…
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So you train by shadow boxing, search for the truth.
For the first time during our holiday we managed to get up early. For anyone who’s struggled to jiggle their body into a full six hours in the future, I’m sure you’ll understand what a milestone this was. We’d gone to bed to the sound of the Frog Chorus and woken up to the Dawn Chorus. As is my wont, I was regretting booking a Muay Thai session due to the wine and dancing session the night before. I did what I always do in such situations though and marched with purpose to the gym, pretending that I was in a movie. I find it helps. After a coke in…
